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By Cathy Hunt

Now that school is back in session, this retired English teacher and self-styled language watchdog has a few reminders for all good students.

Whenever this side of me wants to be heard, I like to include a disclaimer that I’m not perfect and that I’m certainly open to correction. For instance, I recently saw the phrase “bury the lede” (which I have always thought of as “bury the lead”) and thought it was a mistake until I looked it up. Journalists in the mid-20th century started using “lede” to distinguish between their craft and the  other meanings and alternate pronunciation of “lead.” Though the spellings for the bad style of not making clear the focus of an article in the opening paragraph are now both acceptable, I consider myself schooled.

Last time the Language Police came out to play, my biggest pet peeve was the widespread use of “I/we seen” instead of “I/we saw.” That one still makes me crazy, but here are a few other items that bother me a lot.

A lot. It’s two words. “Alot” is not a word.

“It’s” is always a contraction of “it is” or “it has,” as in “It’s a pleasure to meet you” or “It’s been a long time.” The apostrophe should not be there if you’re showing possession, as in “The team won all of its games,” or “The bank opened its new branch.” You are not saying “all of it is games” or “opened it is new branch.”

Speaking of apostrophes, don’t use them to make something plural. “There are a lot of dogs at the shelter” is correct while “many dog’s at the shelter” is not. “The Hunts live there” but the Hunt’s do not.

Please say that you feel good or you feel bad. If you were to feel badly, it would mean that your sense of touch is out of whack.

This next item is understandably hard to master, because who really wants to ponder subjective and objective case pronouns? But be careful of phrases like “It was given to John and I as an anniversary gift.” If John were not in the equation, you would say “It was given to me” so use “me” no matter how many others are the recipients of the action.

“Literally” can be an annoyance. “Literally” implies exactness and fact. So please don’t say, “I am literally going to explode.” No, you’re not. If you say you’re going to explode, that is all the figurative language you need to convey your anger.

This next item is from my dad, and I also have to admit that I have yelled at the TV announcer or actor who pronounces a currently widely-used word as “fentan-ALL.” My hypothesis is that the speaker is being influenced by the pronunciation of Tylenol. But look at the correct spelling: fentanyl.

Of course, spelling is quirky. The correct spelling of “judgment” in our country calls for dropping the “e” in “judge” while in England they retain it. This probably dates to Noah Webster’s 1828 dictionary which helped standardize American English. He dropped letters that the Brits used, such as the “u” in words like “colour.”

I’ll end today’s review with something I’ve seen a good bit lately, what with all the name-calling on social media. Don’t you just love it when someone retorts “Your stupid!” or “Your uneducated!”? I don’t make a habit of correcting typos in today’s quick messaging, but when a commenter is especially pompous or arrogant, it feels kind of good to follow up with: “Or maybe *you’re* uneducated.” I may or may not feel bad about that.